Healing Your Church Hurt by Stephen Mansfield

Healing Your Church Hurt by Stephen Mansfield

If there was ever a time the right book came to me at the right time it is this one. Healing Your Church Hurt by Stephen Mansfield is an excellent book on the subject everyone of us in church deals with but afraid to even mention it. If you have been attending church or a member of your church for any length of time you have run into it. Experienced it. Endured it. Broken by it. Bitter because of it. Even turned away from God because of it. Its not God's Word that hurt you in a bad way. Nothing from the Bible. In fact, most of us would admit we would rather be smacked in the face with a Bible than being hurt from an insensitive word from a fellow brother or sister in Christ.

Our expectations of church and how it is supposed to be and operate are so much different than the realities each one of us experience. We look at God's house as a fortress. One we can run into for protection, for love, for kindness, for learning, for encouragement or just plain hide. We do not enter these divine gates for ridicule, distrust and out right cruelty. But if you are a true church goer you have in fact experienced the downside and the dark-side of the church.

My church hurts, and I do mean hurts, run deep to my very core. Dare I say even to my soul. That in fact is true. It is when such hurts which we perceive as inflicted upon us by another begin to slowly at first infect our souls with bitterness. A bitterness from Satan himself. Like a cancer growing undetected until it appears too late. We are so bitter that the church now begins to represent the very thing that causes us pain. Anything associated with it now becomes a cruel reminder to us.

Author Stephen Mansfield hits it on the head. How we go beyond the memories and continue to re-live the very thing, memory, situation, people and persons that deepen the wound and place ourselves in the very dark pit we desire to escape. He refers to it as, “The Season of Hell.” Through the course of the book I was determine to use the principals used and taught by the author. Regardless of the pain I knew and did feel through my own personal Season of Hell it had to be done. Which in turn prepared me for the next Church Hurt.

This book is for 99% of those who have called church home. There is no doubt in my mind that anyone has been so perfect not to have experienced a Church Hurt that cuts them down to their knees.

I personally have had to re-read many of the parts of this book. Revisit my Season of Hell on occasion. I can safely say I can remember the events, people, the words and the physical pain deep within my heart. But I no longer re-live them. No longer let the teeth of the trap inject the poison of bitterness continually into my soul without my permission any more.

Is this a life changing book? For me, Yes. Going deep into scripture to the very Hebrew and Greek words originally used. Learning and applying God's Word directly into my life. Seeing the reality of the situations. Addressing why I would even consider the opinions of such people valid or of any value to me? Many of those who speak do so without knowing or caring at the time. As they go through life it becomes second nature to them. The bitterness pouring out of them without question. Ask them to pass the salt and they find some way of releasing some of the bitterness at you like some splattering water balloon. Trying to get everyone wet.

I have always had a problem with authority. Nearly everyone I have met who had some title never was able to live up to it. In fact, many of which are just the opposite and determine to hinder anyone who dares to work towards achieving more and helping others to do the same. One thing I have learned from this book that those within the church are held to a higher authority than the rest of us. They often forget it is God they serve. It is God they must answer too. We too forget. For we too answer to God. The wicked things we do even if we are unaware have consequences that we will be judged for. The problem is we are too afraid to make known or to call another out when obviously what they are doing or done is wrong according to scripture. The procedure for such is spelled out plainly in God's Word. Still we, as well as I. have become to afraid to do it. It is simpler to just leave and hop to another church.

In his book Stephen Mansfield gives us the blueprint on what questions must be answered before joining a church. Before leaving your church and searching for another. Going beyond the entertainment factor to the heart of service. Is your church preparing you for the work of the Kingdom? This question must be answered by each of us.

This book is worth twice its costs. I find it a much needed part of the puzzle in my daily walk with Christ. Church hurts will continue to come. You will not be able to avoid them unless you have taken the easy way out and left the very brothers and sisters that need you. Ones you have not even met yet. 

The Journey:

I grew up an atheist. Not by any means focused upon me. I was raised in an environment where it was accepted that knowledge and science had the answers. That we controlled our own destiny. Our actions determined our outcome and nothing was beyond that.

My first experience with the so called “Church” was when I was a young boy. Went with my Uncle's family one Sunday while on vacation in Southern California. Went to Sunday school with my cousins, who had been raised in the church since babies. I was handed a Bible, the first I had ever seen one, then the class was ask to turn to chapter and verse. I had no idea what they were talking about. So I sat there. Soon the other kids realized my lack of biblical fortitude and began to laugh at me. Short story: I never wanted to return to church again. It would be twenty years till my next encounter with the “Church.”

I would be thirty-two years old before I came to Christ. As I rose from the baptismal waters it felt like I was in-cased in a block of marble that suddenly turned to Jello and wash over me and off me.

This day, the eve of Christmas I look back and scan through the notes of my worn Bible, not asking why, but looking forward. Perhaps truly for the first time. The last two years of my life have been the darkest I have known and wish not to know again.

Would I have made it through this dark valley of time in my life without Christ? No way. Did I come to Christ for a better life? One of prosperity? One of fun and joy? That's what the world proclaims Christians to be and be living. Nothing could be farther from the truth. No, I came to Christ because of the judgment. I still do. No matter how good a life I could ever try to lead I would come up short on judgment day.

The fact of the matter, I come up short everyday. Something goes wrong I get angry. The opportunity to help someone else passes by me to only realize later I could of helped that person with little effort or cost to my living.

Tonight I am looking forward to going to a Christmas Eve Church Service. Partaking in the Lord's Supper. Unfortunately it is not being held in a church which my family and I are members. Yet, the members there welcome us as family each year. It is a service filled with love. Love not only from above but by those who love Christ. I am blessed this Christmas. -Amen

Me and My Broken Wagon:

The day before Thanksgiving day on my way home from work my car breaks down. Not an uncommon thing. Cars break down all the time. With thousands of parts, nuts and bolts. Gears turning and the wear of the road it's something we have come to expect. When ever your car breaks down it always causes confusion and inconvenience. Especially during the holidays and cold weather. 

So I jack-up the car. Put it up on jack-stands and began to inspect for what I thought was wrong with it. Within minutes I realize this is a job beyond my abilities. That's when the frustration kicks in. Here I have a box load of tools I have gained over the past twenty years. A fairly decent knowledge of auto mechanics. Yet, there I am. Standing in front of a mountain with a shovel and a few spoons. At least that is what it feels like. I have the tools to tear it all apart, but lack the knowledge and experience to finish the job. I have only one choice. Seek help and I know it is going to cost me.

As Christians we face the same thing each day in our Christian Walk. As we read and study the Bible we gain knowledge and I pray, wisdom. We might even go beyond that. Say we attend seminary. We study. We interact with fellow Christians and professors. We write papers and dissertations. We enter into theology and doctoral issues. Really get into the spiritual meat of it.

Yet, each day we know peoples' lives are broken. With all this knowledge more often than most we still stand before others as if standing in front of a mountain with little more than a spoon in hand. We have all the tools we need. Yet, we cannot do it by ourselves.

I was recently asked, “What possibly could be the benefits of fear?” One benefit of fear is to know that we must rely on God. We must seek out help, which begins with prayer. Seeking out help will cost you. First price you will pay is pride. It's hard for a man to be beaten by a machine. A chunk of metal and plastic with wires running here and there. It's even harder for a man to step down from pride and reach up for help.

Is prayer going to fix my car? No, God has given me the first step. To pray and rely on Him. Seek help. It will cost me. God has a purpose in all this. I will let you know how it comes out.

Teach, Preach and Reach. 

Standing at Your Post:

During the Civil War in the year 1861, Sam Watkins, of Company H in the First Tennessee Infantry came upon a little village called Hampshire Crossing in Virginia. Their regiment was ordered to relieve the 3rd Arkansas. When Watkins' regiment arrived they found the guard. In fact they found 11 of them. Some where sitting. Some lying down. Each and everyone at their posts. Each one was frozen solid, dead. Two of them, sentinels, with loaded guns standing in advance of the others hard frozen as monuments of marble. Guns still in their frozen hands. Watkins noted how horrifying it was to see them all with icicles hanging from their faces and hands. As the cold of death approached them. They must have known what was coming, but remained at their post till the end.


The need for “Watchmen” is found throughout the Bible. Within the Old and New Testaments.

As Moses led the people through the desert, they still longed for the cucumbers of Egypt (Num. 11:5). They planted cucumber gardens in Palestine (Is. 1:8); in this text, the “lodge in a garden of cucumbers” refers to a shelter used by watchmen to guard the crops.
Nelson's illustrated manners and customs of the Bible (239). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

The Hebrew landowner seldom visited his fields during the growing season. Instead he hired watchmen to stay in crude lounges (also called “towers”—Mark 12:1), where they protected the crop from beasts, birds, and marauders.
Nelson's illustrated manners and customs of the Bible (256). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

The men of the 3rd Arkansas, did not die in a famous battle. Their names are not published. The location of their graves unknown. Who will remember them? Not history or will their deeds be sung in songs of victory. Who will remember these men?

God will! How many times as Christians have we stood at our post? It might be just opening a door for others at church, a grocery store, a shopping mall or some mundane task. We stay at our post, none the less. From the one who cleans the bathrooms to the pastor preaching from the pulpit. From the janitor to the CEO of a Fortune 500 company. Each of us has a task(s). Each of us is part of the body of Christ. One cannot complete the job at hand without the other.

In a world that is “All About Me.” We look down upon others who stand at their posts. Who do the tasks of the mundane. Therefore, ask yourself, Why did Christ come as a servant?

For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many. Matt 20:28 (NLT)

Christ remained at His post while others mocked Him. He knew death was coming. He could have called for angels above to release Him. He would have had every right to call upon the complete destruction of man that very moment. He did not. Jesus remained at His post.

Today is Thanksgiving Day. Let us be truly thankful for Christ. Every moment of the day He is at His post. Next to you. Loving you. Seeking you. Can we at least take a moment to seek Him?

Peace be with you.

Teach, Preach and Reach.

Muscular Faith by Ben Patterson

Ben Patterson's new book was not what I expected and I am glad for it. Taking your faith seriously is a 24/7 job. God's first and second commandments absolutely require it. Yet in our day-to-day lives we seem (myself included) to put God's commandments on the back burner of our lives. Then wonder why our lives are more of a roller-coaster ride than the abundant life God wants for us.

My copy of Patterson's book is already filled with highlights and notes. His use of scriptures, personal accounts and life narratives keep your interest from start to finish.

Like the Apostle Paul taught, we need to approach our faith as Ben Patterson so very well describes it with “Vigorous Faith.” We must train. It takes time and commitment. Focusing on the prize means giving up and putting aside self-interest (Self) and truly committing yourself to God. Easier said than done in today's world. It is the world we are fighting against. The world wants to take your attention away from God.

The four parts of Muscular Faith give you easy reference to go back to. Not a step-by-step process in such but a where to go reference. The style is down to earth writing in my opinion. If you're a new Christian or a tried and true veteran you will enjoy and learn from this book. Yes, we get beat up and pushed back in our life. So many of us wish just to sit in the stands and roar with the crowd. Patterson teaches that is not what we have been called to do. We need to get onto the field and run the race. Before we do. We need to train daily. Focus on the prize. Get our house in order. Push through and realize the “good hard” and the “bad hard.” Keep building in our daily walk with Christ.

This book is well worth reading. An excellent book to give to other Christians. Whether they are new or old. Whether they are struggling with their faith or enjoying life abundantly. It will help them both.

Encouragement Technology:

Technology is a fundamental part of American society. While watching the History Channel's Top 101 Gadgets the cell phone was rated the most influential gadget of all time so far. Last week at the hospital I saw cell phones, smart phones, laptops, netbooks, tablet PCs and to the best of my knowledge there was just three of us carrying a Bible.

With so much technology and communication you would think as a Christian the more opportunities for witnessing for Christ. Just the opposite is happening. Each year we see less baptisms and church membership continues to decline nationwide. How is this possible with so much technology and communication right at our fingertips?

Is it technological etiquette? Is it separation of church and state? How about the separation of church and God?

You Got Prayer! At least that is how I look at it when I send my prayers to others by texting. Yes, texting. Why not? Could you use an encouraging prayer sent to you during the day? I know I need as many prayers as possible. How about you?

It works two-fold. One: we are to pray now and not later. Now just does not fit in my schedule. Prayer is all about the now. Two: It keeps you focused. Focused on the needs of others. Sending prayers via technology lets you remind yourself several times a day about the needs of others. I often review the prayers I have sent during the day and pray again for them.

I wonder what Paul might think of all this technology? Would he like it that we now have audio visual presentations during church. That we chat on our phones and texting 24/7? I am sure he would appreciate how far we have come, but there would be no valid excuse for not carrying a Bible with us at all times. We have pocket Bibles, techno Bibles, audio Bibles and online Bibles. We have more opportunities to share Christ than ever before, but we don't.

Go ahead. Be different and encourage others using today's technology. By phone, text, email or even by an old fashion card or letter. Use technology to share God's Word in today's fast pace world. It might just slow up enough to hear God.

Teach, Preach and Reach.

No Response

Yesterday, Friday, June 24, 2011 the Sate of New York passed a law for same-sex marriage becoming the largest state in the union making same-sex marriage legal. While viewing the New York Times website I saw no evidence or rebuttal from any affiliation of the Roman Catholic Church. Then I went to the Southern Baptist Convention website. There again I found absolutely no response or rebuttal on the recent event. The Catholic Church and the Southern Baptist Convention represent the two largest Christian organizations on the planet. Yet, they remain silent on the matter.

Homosexuality is deemed a political hot potato. Same in our pulpits as more and more preachers are threatened with being accused of promoting “Hate Crimes.” It seems our First Amendment rights from the Constitution of the United States continues to take a back seat to organized political machines.

Years ago when I lived in California I worked in an office where several of the employees were Gay. Even the boss was a lesbian. Not once was any sexual slur or any inappropriate action was ever taken against me or anyone else in the office. In fact those who were Gay were some of the hardest working employees there. I cannot say the same for any Christians. Based on that experience, the Gay community has my respect. Which I must say does not sit well with my Christian beliefs.

Homosexuality is a sin. That does not give us the right to persecute individuals for we ourselves as Christians have been persecuted and still are throughout world-wide. Today in our century.

What a political hot potato this is! If we as Christians do nothing then thousands of brothers and sisters will be going straight to Hell for their sin. If we make a stand we are looked upon as no better than the Romans who mercilessly slaughtered millions of Christians.

It is the sin and not the sinner we should be against. Hard to separate the two. As Christians we should be the first ones to step up and freely admit that we are sinners. Making us no different. Yet, Christianity does not stop there. After giving ourselves to Christ we must follow and obey. This means giving up our sinful life and/or lifestyle. This is the problem all of us Christians face each day. Do we obey God or not? This question stands in front of each Christian every second of our life once saved by grace through Jesus Christ.

So what do we do? We cannot condone it. We cannot ignore it. We cannot persecute and condemn them.

A homosexual couple is not welcome in a church. Yet, one of the first things we offer is to come to church. The very place, ground zero, of persecution in their eyes. What alternative can we offer? Their eternal salvation for one, but that is hard to see shaded by us Christians standing in the way of the will of God.

As Christians we do not speak with one voice. With nearly 80% of the population of the United States claiming to be Christian we cannot even vote Christians into positions of political power. In the book of John, chapter 17 is the longest prayer ever recorded of Jesus. A prayer of unity. As Christians we are no closer to that unity as we were 2,000 years ago when Christ first made that prayer. How sad a thought.

If we had boldly given our lives to Christ then we would fully admit that we are no longer calling the shots in our lives. That we are no longer truly in control of our lives. Jesus, not me is in control of my life. This goes against worldly thinking. It we truly have given our lives over to Christ we would support our pastors, preachers and evangelists around the world to freely preach and proclaim God's Word. No matter who it might offend. The very souls of our brothers and sisters as well as our own are at stake here. We fail to realize it. Too busy with our day-to-day activities. Working at a job. Paying bills and living for the weekend.

Solution:

We need to publicly proclaim God's Word no matter what the consequences. If the law threatens our pastors, preachers and evangelists then we must go with them. Insisting that we be jailed too. We need to learn to witness as Jesus did. See Luke 18 beginning with verse 18. Convincing others that we are all guilty in God's eyes. That we have sinned against God. Heart convicted as we kneel at the cross and not a promise of prosperity as many of the modern gospel preach. God centered preaching and not a man centered message. Not offering an alternative lifestyle. The offering of an eternal salvation through Christ and Christ only. 


Teach, Preach and Reach.